Estate Planning Risks Magnified by Coercive Control

Abusive relationships often involve isolation, financial control, surveillance, and intimidation—factors that make it harder to make (or safely store) a Will. When a person dies intestate in that context, several risks escalate:

1. Funeral and body disposal decisions may fall to the abusive partner (or the person perceived legally as the spouse/de facto), even if the broader family relationship is supportive.
2. Immediate access to possessions and information—phones, documents, sentimental items—can be controlled by the person administering the estate, creating distress and evidentiary complications.
3. Distribution outcomes are dictated by statute, not safety. NSW intestacy rules prioritise a spouse/de facto partner in many common family scenarios.
4. Litigation becomes the “safety net”. Families may be forced into urgent Supreme Court applications about administration and related disputes at the worst possible time—costly, slow, and emotionally draining.

What safer planning can look like in NSW (especially where abuse is present)

For people in or exiting abusive relationships, a basic estate plan can be protective:

• Make a Will early naming an executor you trust (not your partner by default).
• Include clear directions about who is to control your personal effects, and use a separate, safely stored “letter of wishes” for funeral preferences (recognising wishes aren’t always legally binding, but they guide your executor/administrator).
• Review beneficiary settings outside the Will (especially superannuation and insurance) and update them after separation.
• Plan for safe execution and storage: use a lawyer, avoid shared email/printing, and store copies somewhere the abusive party cannot access.

For more information please refer to our article The Story of Caitlin Thornton-how dying without a will can leave control in the wrong hands or speak with one of our experienced Estate Planning Team on 8525 2700, alternatively click here to request an appointment, or use the Book Now button below. Our Estate Planning Team includes Rebecca Exley, Michael Solari, Nicole Commandeur and Valentina Abouzeid. 

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